John 21:15-19
Listen Here.
We heard in acts how Peter is the rock, the Petra, the lead witness to what Jesus has done for us. This week, As I imagined Peter's encounter with Jesus on that beach…I began to hear this story from his perspective…[Read the rest as the character of Peter].
Three times I had denied him. Three times.
I could not let it go. I will never forget what it felt like to be warming my hands by the fire and feel my insides go ice cold. Three times.
There we were, waiting to know his fate. Confused. He clearly did not want us to fight. And now that we were in Pilates court, surrounded by guards, that would have been foolish in every way. We would have had 12 dead men, not just one.
By that fire the girl asked me. The one who was the servant of the high priest. Surely, she had seen me before, she had heard the conversations of the religious authorities. Surely she had heard the list of our names more than once. The one who were being watched. Being followed, lest we be ready to take up arms to fight. That’s what they were afraid of.
Or something.
That we would do something to disturb the Pax Romana that the authorities worked so hard to keep in place. They say they didn’t want another slaughter of the innocents, but there they were, ready to slaughter an innocent man. A man who is God in flesh among us. Our Savior.
They had no idea what they were doing.
And neither did I.
What was I supposed to do? I stood by that fire, awaiting his fate. I felt so completely helpless and hopeless. What would happen? He had said he would go away… go to the father. That he would come back to us. That he would send the holy spirit… that he did all this on behalf of the Father… on his authority, by the Father’s will.
Is this what the Father’s authority would finally look like… death?
He said that the ruler of this world would come… and come that powerful ruler did. The world’s power was heavy in that place, around that fire.
And what were we supposed to do, his faithful followers. We had listened, we had strived to learn. We had seen his power, felt it brush by when we baptized, when we gathered that abundant bread, when we felt his hand on our feet.
“Love one another, Love one another, this is my new commandment for you, love one another,” he had said. That night before. Around that table. And here I was, unable to love Jesus, unable to even admit I knew him, paralyzed by fear. Paralyzed by the earthly rulers power – so palpable in the night, in the crowd, in the courts, near that fire.
I couldn’t shake the memory of that night.
And then I found myself standing around another fire.
Jesus had shown up again – a third time after he was raised from the dead. The three times I denied him were still haunting me. I longed to change the past.
What was I supposed to do? I stood by that fire, awaiting my fate. I felt so completely helpless and hopeless. What would happen?
Three times he asked me, Do you love me?
And three times, I answered.
It was strange at first, I didn’t really understand what was going on. You know how sometimes you don’t put together the meaning of things until you step back and reflect on them? It dawned on my later, much like he dawned on us with the Sun – shining on that beach like a beacon of hope for my weary spirit.
Do I love Jesus? Of course! Of Course! Of Course! Lord, You know that I love you!
And yet it wasn’t even just about my love. It wasn’t just about loving one another in the sense of him and me and the disciples around that table. It wasn’t just about being a caring community for one another… In that moment he connected the dots.
Feed my sheep.
Each time I said I loved him. He didn’t challenge me. Except it felt like a challenge, to just be asked three times. Standing around that fire that reminded me of that night. Only by asking three time did he remind me of my three denials. He reminded me what loving him is all about.
Feed my sheep.
And it all came flooding back…
11 “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. 12 The hired hand, who is not the shepherd and does not own the sheep, sees the wolf coming and leaves the sheep and runs away—and the wolf snatches them and scatters them. 13 The hired hand runs away because a hired hand does not care for the sheep. 14 I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, 15 just as the Father knows me and I know the Father. And I lay down my life for the sheep. 16 I have other sheep that do not belong to this fold. I must bring them also, and they will listen to my voice. So there will be one flock, one shepherd. 17 For this reason the Father loves me, because I lay down my life in order to take it up again. 18 No one takes[a] it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it up again. I have received this command from my Father.”
He is the good shepherd.
He has sheep I don’t even know about yet.
He wants me to feed them.
With his promises.
His Word.
His Truth.
He is the Good shepherd. He is the bread of life. He is the light of the world. He IS.
The one who was and is and is to come.
The one who shows us what it is to love, and does not ask us, “Are you doing enough?” or “What are you doing?” No. He asks, “Do you love me?”
As I stood by that fire for the second time, Jesus looked at me and did not seek out my report card. He sought out my heart. My desire to love Jesus and his way. My desire to love and be loved. He sought out that place in me that God seeks to fill with pure, absolute, unconditional love.
For that’s all it means to love Jesus, to feed his sheep. To look into the face of another sheep, another neighbor, any neighbor, even the neighbor who hates you, and look at them with the unrepentant, forgiving, absolute love of God.
There he was. Standing next to me by that fire, proclaiming one more time that even my messed up denial was nothing to his claim on me.
“Feed my sheep,” he said,
“Follow me.”
Amen.
P: Alleluia! Christ is Risen! C: He is risen Indeed! Alleluia!
Sunday, April 22, 2018
Sunday, April 15, 2018
In the Dark
John 21:1-14
Grace to you and peace from our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
They are at it again.
Spending all their time in the dark.
You have noticed by now, most likely, that all the way
through John there is a focus on whether someone can see, whether there is
light illuminating what needs to be seen…a focus on whether someone hangs out
in the dark or comes into the light.
So here are these beautiful, broken human disciples of Jesus…
the ones who spent the the first few days after Jesus death hiding in the
dark. The ones who continued to hide for
7 days after Jesus appears to them in that dark room as the light of life. The ones who still needed him to show up
again on the 7th day helping them to see with his hands and his
side, that it was, really him.
And here they are… Fishing in the dark!
I don’t know about first century fishing, so maybe someone
here can prove me wrong, But it seems
that for their lifestyle of fishing on lakes and small seas, in small wooden
boats… it’s unlikely that fishing at night was the easiest way to get the job
done. And even if it was, it doesn’t
change the fact that the Gospel of John – like most Biblical works – do not
waste words. If John tells us they were
fishing at night. In the dark. It matters. Especially since we’ve been reading all the
way through John and we’ve heard about people being in the dark before.
So here Jesus comes, once again, at daybreak, to Illuminate…
well, first he shows them how to get more fish.
More actual fish. But it doesn’t
take too much of a leap to remember those first words he said to men like them…
“I’ll teach you how to fish for people.”
Jesus has already given them the holy spirit in John, they
aren’t waiting around for it like they do in Luke-Acts. Which also means Jesus
has given them no time to recover. They
are still reeling from the crucifixion of their leader, and the confusing of
their new status as empowered apostles… and so they go fishing.
For fish. Not people.
I imagine Jesus showing up and seeing them in that boat and
thinking… well, I guess that’s one way to deal with your existential
angst. And then calling out to them… Hey
guys, having any luck?
Jesus shows up in the light of dawn to show them a thing or
two about fish, and how to catch them.
And the power of God.
Unlike in Acts, which we read every year at the Festival of
Pentecost, 50 days after Easter. These
disciples get the Holy Spirit the very same day that Jesus rises from the
dead. In Acts that leads to tongues of
fire and immediate extensive preaching about what God is up to in Jesus, the
Christ, the Messiah. But John takes a
more compassionate and relatable view of the Holy Spirit’s arrival. It takes days, maybe even weeks, and the
disciples are still in the dark… hiding in the dark, staying in the dark room
for a week, fishing under the cover of darkness…
Here, in this Sacred Story, we who hear the story get to SEE
before the disciples, how it will all unfold.
WE get to listen to them and respond in mutual anxiety… or inspiration…
or dumbfoundedness at how slow they are.
Whatever our judgement of them, there is room for us here. Whatever our own response to Jesus’ resurrection
and giving of the Holy Spirit, we can observe that these disciples took a
while, and so it is ok if it takes us, or our neighbors, a while too…
Let’s go back to that dark room for a few minutes. The room we heard about last week. Let’s remember what Jesus actually does when
he shows up – Jesus said,
“Peace be with
you.” 20 After he said this, he showed them his hands and
his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. 21 Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As
the Father has sent me, so I send you.” 22 When he had said this, he breathed on them and
said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. 23 If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven
them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”
And he had promised to do all this – to send the Holy Spirit…
remember? Right before he died, one of
the last things he said to them…
25 “I have said these things to you while I am still
with you. 26 But the Advocate,[i] the
Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you everything,
and remind you of all that I have said to you. 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I
do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and
do not let them be afraid.
He promised to send the Spirit, the Advocate, and that
promise was to give them Peace. This is
the peace Jesus gives. Not the peace of
false security in your bank account. Not
the peace of a lack-of-war. Not the
peace of Rome, the Pax Romana that promised peace through submission to the
world’s super-power. Not the peace
promised by politicans today. No, this
peace is the peace that surpasses all understanding. The peace that Jesus gives to all of us. The
peace we live when we immerse ourselves in Jesus who is the way, the truth and
the life. The peace that Jesus gives roots us in the faith we have in our God.
The Trustworthy One who holds us like a lamb, who searches us out when we have
been lost, who loves us so completely he died that we might not fear death, or
life. And this peace does something to us.
It doesn’t just rest in our hearts and let us be. It begs to be shared. It is peace in community. It is peace that works for God’s justice in
the world. It is peace that pushes the
boundaries of who we think we should connect with, who we think we should care
about – always, more and more, further and further, until we realize that our
peace is related to their peace. And we
are sent to bring it to them.
Just like that man blind from birth who was healed in that
pool named Sent. Just like that woman
from the well who ran through town telling about Jesus. Just like these disciples have been sent. You and I, and everyone who has received the
Holy Spirit in baptism has been sent too… Sent to love each other as Jesus
loves them. Sent to forgive people and
hold them accountable to this love in community. Sent to be peace holders, and peace
givers. The peace that surpasses all
understanding.
So this week, if you feel like you are locked in the dark of
your own life experience. If you had a
hard enough time getting out of bed this morning. If you are struggling to see the hope in our
dreary world, then know this. Jesus
keeps showing up to find you. To give
you, again and again, the gift of new life, of his life. The gift of the life of peace when there is
no peace. The gift of life in the midst
of a loving community, no matter how hard it is to love one another. The gift of a life of fishing – for others –
who are waiting for Jesus to show up for them too… maybe even in the shape of
you.
Thanks be to
God! Amen.
P: Alleluia! Christ is Risen! C: He
is risen Indeed! Alleluia!
Sunday, April 8, 2018
What can you see?
Grace to you and peace from our Lord and Savior, Jesus
Christ.
The disciples have been in that room all day. Doors locked.
Lights out. No talking. There is a sinister movement right outside
their door. The religious leaders have
succeeded in killing Jesus of Nazareth.
They want to be sure the whole rebellious group is quieted. And stays that way. They are coming for them. Or at least, that
is what the disciples believe.
That morning Peter and the beloved disciple were in the empty
tomb. But now, they have entombed
themselves in this room. Death’s power
has been shattered. But not for
them. They cannot see what has
happened. They cannot see what has come
of this horrifying death. They cannot
see what has come of the abandoned tomb.
No, they feel abandoned. They
were not prepared for this, though Jesus told them what would happen. Here they sit, in the dark. Not seeing the big picture. Not seeing what it all means.
And then The Light slips in.
The locks cannot keep it out.
Even this heavy, oppressive darkness cannot out-weigh The Light. The Light has a power that cuts through
darkness. No matter how much darkness
there is, it cannot extinguish the light.
The disciples of Jesus, hiding in the dark, look up and see
the light. The body and blood of Jesus
stands before them. The living
resurrected flesh of the man they saw die in the darkness, is visible before
them and they can see… a little bit.
They hold onto the power of the darkness, it is just too hard
to believe. To hard to see that they can
let go of it. But Jesus is coming to
show them what God’s power is really like.
This is what they have been asking for, “Show us the Father” they have said.
But “No one has ever seen God. It is God the only Son, who is
close to the Father’s heart, who has made him known.”
For he is “the Word became flesh and lived among us, and we
have seen his glory, the glory as of a father’s only son, full of grace and
truth.”
These are the disciples who invited each other to “Come and
See.” These are the disciples who were
there when Nicodemus came in the cover of darkness to figure out how to “See
the kingdom.” These are the people who
heard the woman run from the well exclaiming, “Come see the man who has told me
everything I have ever done!” They saw
the man blind from birth have his SIGHT HEALED at the pool called SENT.
They have seen the signs.
They have heard the proclamation – have they seen? Have they used their eyes and their hearts
and their minds to See what is really going on here?
“In him was life and the life was the light of all people”
(John 1:3). God’s primary work is to create Life
and Light. Jesus carried this Light and Life into the
world, he was and is and forever will be Life and Light for us! Can they see it? Can we?
They keep hiding. In
the dark. For 7 days.
They are afraid. There
might be an angry mob outside their door, ready to lynch them.
Jesus comes into the darkness in which they are hiding, not
once, but twice. He comes again for
Thomas, and all of them, who are still
locked in. Jesus comes to bring the
light, to give them life…so they can finally,
See.
This should be comforting for anyone who has trouble Seeing
Jesus. It took the people who lived with
him for three years and did ministry with him two visits from the resurrected
Jesus to just walk out the door.
When Thomas asked for the experience, the comfort, the
reality of seeing Jesus for himself, Jesus didn’t say. “Come on, guys! I have been telling you this for three
years!!” He just showed up again,
shining a light that cuts through the darkness of their fears, their doubts,
their confusion.
And Jesus does that for us.
Today, Jesus shows up in the baptism of this baby Grace. This Amazing Grace in Seth and Amy’s lives,
who witnesses to all of us that God’s amazing grace keeps showing up. Keeps lighting a candle of hope. Keeps embracing us as God’s children. Keeps inviting us into this hope-filled work
of letting Christ’s light shine.
Here at Bethlehem we are Shining
the Light of God’s love. We are
shining it through the trees and into our community. Each of us with our own unique gifts, God can
use us. God wants to use our open eyes
and hearts to shed light for those who cannot yet see.
CS Lewis says, “I believe in Jesus as I believe in the sun,
not because I See it but because by it I see everything else.”
How are you called to See by the Light of Jesus? And to help others see by that same light?
I know God calls me to see injustice and to respond to it. It
is part of our baptismal vocation, our baptismal calling, to work for justice
and peace in all the earth. Each
person’s life of faith will look different depending upon with what God has
given them to work. But there is no
question we are gifted. And no question
that God will use anything and everything, even a horrifying death on the
cross, for God’s purposes. So how is God
shining a light through you? How is God
nudging, or shoving, you to share the amazing grace we have been given – the
light of Christ?
Can you see it? I can.
Thanks be to God! Amen. P: Alleluia! Christ
is Risen! C: He is risen Indeed! Alleluia!
Sunday, April 1, 2018
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